Exes, everyone has them. Sometimes the break up is amicable and more often than not the relationship ended with hurt feelings and deleting each other’s info from your blackberry. But throughout time it seems it’s inevitable that your ex will eventually find their way back into your missed call log or your inbox. The message may go something like this: "Hey, I just thought of you and wanted to see how you were doing. Hope all is well." Then, if you're bored in your single life or just plain curious, you'll respond and say- "Hi, how've you been?" Suddenly this dialogue between the two of you becomes much more frequent. Their name makes it back into your contact list and you convince yourself that you can try being friends.
Now, if you're flying solo rekindling the relationship gives you something to do. It allows you to have someone else to talk to on those late nights when you're up. It makes you feel good to hear that person say that they miss you and that they wished things would have been different.
For those in a relationship and talking to an ex, you try to convince yourself that it's okay because you're in a committed relationship; which you've told them. You don't feel like there's anything wrong with it because they're an old "friend" and your current partner knows all about them, except for the fact that you're talking to them again. You keep that little detail to yourself because it’s on a need to know basis. And deep down you know it would cause problems. But you can't help but enjoy reminiscing on old times and when your ex tells you that you were the one that got away. You think- “Ya dam straight, why are you just now realizing that?" But it's too late now because after all the heartache & tears you've finally moved on to someone that does love you, yet you've put yourself right back where you started.
Now, the casual texts with the ex can only last so long until it turns into calls and lunch invites. Suddenly you talk to your old friend more than you do you're other friends. If you're in a relationship this is a bad sign because now you have to hide this knowing dam well that your partner is not going to be happy with it because you sure as hell wouldn't.
If you're single you find yourself getting wrapped up into the possibilities of your ex being a changed person. You may fantasize about their qualities, like how good they were in bed or how they could always make you laugh. You may even entertain the idea of giving things a try. Or you're bored and don't mind the attention because everyone likes to have their ego stroked from time to time so you roll with it.
If you're in a relationship the talk may become too much. You love the attention but somehow feel wrong about it. If you're unhappy in your present relationship having made contact with your ex could be the greatest outlet to fill that void.
Yet, despite it all something usually happens that knocks you off your feet & brings that ass back to earth. Something prolific happens that makes you realize why your ex is your ex!
It goes something like this- you'll be having a great conversation and your ex will say some ignorant mess that doesn't sit right with you. Or they assume that they still know you and you're exact thoughts when it couldn't be further from the truth. Or they show you their crazy side that you remember having to deal with, despite the fact that they said they've matured. Or they come up with unrealistic expectations knowing that you're in a relationship but swear by the stars that there's a reason why your paths crossed again. Or you find out that they have kids from different people and wish those kids were yours. Yet again, crazy ass thoughts!
When things don't turn out the way you both thought, even after the great sex or what used to be great sex before they gained the weight, you realize you want “out” all over again.
Suddenly you try to talk less frequently or make up excuses for not replying to their text messages. Then you find yourself with a hurt stalker who won't leave you alone. Or, you find that the tables are turned and you're that stalker (*gasp*). So yet again, you have a major falling out which causes you to first change their name to "do not answer" in your address book and eventually you delete all their info again as if you’re permanently erasing them from the universe.
There's a reason why your ex is an ex. So keep that door closed. If you're even tempted put a lock on it and throw away the key.
Let me know what you're thoughts are.
Hearts and Hugs!
Januari
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
wow! That was the best one that I've read so far. Too many people get caught up with the past. Some are brought back to reality, but too many go right back and end up in the same bad relationship. The problem is though, that it's worst the second time around cuz now the ex knows you will come back.
ReplyDelete